One tween told their mom they needed to stay up… to “fix the world.”
“Bedtime resistance isn’t just a phase—it’s a developmental milestone,” says Dr. Cohen, a child psychologist.
Bedtime with tweens is like negotiating a peace treaty—except the stakes are higher because, somehow, they’re never tired. One minute, they’re yawning. Next, they’ve rediscovered their passion for deep life questions, spontaneous chores, or “fixing the world.”
I once heard, “But Mom, I need to stay up! My stuffed animals are having a meeting.” If you’ve ever faced a master bedtime negotiator, you’re in for a treat—because these excuses are next-level ridiculous. Keep reading… the best one might sound very familiar!
The Sneaky Tactics They Use (And Why They Work!)
Tweens never run out of excuses at bedtime. It’s like they have a secret handbook of delay tactics—and somehow, it works on grown-ups every time. Here’s a closer look at their sneakiest moves:
The “Just One More” Loop
Tactic: They ask for just one more of something… over and over.
Common Phrases:
- “One more game, I swear!”
- “Just one more page… I NEED to know what happens!”
- “One more hug, then I’ll sleep for real!”
Why It Works:
- They know you’ll cave just this once… which turns into five times.
- The requests seem innocent—until it’s way past bedtime.
The Sudden Productivity Burst
Tactic: The second bedtime is announced, they suddenly become the most helpful person in the house.
Common Phrases:
- “I’ll clean my whole room if I can stay up 10 more minutes!”
- “Wait! I just remembered I need to do my homework!”
- “Let me help with the dishes first!”
Why It Works:
- They never want to clean—until bedtime.
- You hesitate because, well… you do want a clean room.
Efficiency Chart:
The Existential Crisis
Tactic: Bedtime is when they suddenly question the meaning of life.
Common Phrases:
- “But what IS time, really?”
- “How do we know we aren’t in a simulation?”
- “If the universe is infinite… then where does it END?!”
Why It Works:
- These questions fry your brain at 9:30 PM.
- You want to engage, but also… go to sleep, child!
A Parent’s Thought Process:
- “That’s a deep question…”
- “I should encourage curiosity.”
- “…Wait, is this a TRAP?”
- “Okay, we’ll talk tomorrow!”
QUIZ: What’s Your Bedtime Negotiation Style?
Tweens are bedtime lawyers, and parents? Well, we’re the judges. But how do you handle those late-night pleas? Let’s find out! Take this quick quiz to discover your bedtime negotiation style—and maybe even learn a trick or two along the way.
How It Works:
- Answer the five questions below.
- Keep track of your A, B, and C answers.
- Check your results at the bottom!
QUIZ TIME!
1️⃣ Your child asks for “just five more minutes.” You…
- A. Say no immediately. Bedtime is bedtime.
- B. Negotiate: “Okay, but only if you get up early tomorrow!”
- C. Give in. It’s just five minutes, right?
2️⃣ They start a deep philosophical debate on “what is time?” You…
- A. Walk away. Not falling for this trick.
- B. Answer briefly, then redirect: “Great question! We’ll talk in the morning.”
- C. Engage fully. Next thing you know, it’s 10 PM and you’re questioning your own existence.
3️⃣ The classic “I need water” excuse. You…
- A. Hand them a water bottle before bedtime. No loopholes here!
- B. Let them go… but only once!
- C. Fetch the water for them because they suddenly forgot how legs work.
4️⃣ They claim their stuffed animal is missing. You…
- A. Say, “Teddy will be fine! Time for bed.”
- B. Help them look… for two minutes max.
- C. Tear the house apart because they’re sobbing like it’s the end of the world.
5️⃣ You’re finally walking out the door when they whisper, “I love you.” You…
- A. Smile, say it back, and close the door.
- B. Give an extra hug and one last tuck-in.
- C. Sit back down for another full 30-minute conversation.
YOUR RESULTS!
Count up your A’s, B’s, and C’s, then check below:
The Bedtime Struggle is Real
If bedtime negotiations were an Olympic sport, tweens would take gold.
Bedtime Negotiation Tactics in Action
Ever heard these before?
Parents around the world agree—these excuses sound oddly familiar!
Top 5 Most Common Bedtime Excuses:
1️⃣ “But I’m not even tired!” (while yawning)
2️⃣ “I forgot to tell you something REALLY important!” (that happened six months ago)
3️⃣ “My stuffed animal is sad.” (because it’s in the same spot as always?)
4️⃣ “If I go to sleep now, I’ll wake up too early!” (excuse me?)
5️⃣ “But what if the floor turns to lava overnight?” (a legit concern, apparently!)
Which One Is Your Life?
- Drop a GIF in the comments that represents your bedtime struggle!
- Have a bedtime excuse we missed? Share it below!
Because laughter is the best coping strategy—especially at bedtime!
Share Your Funniest Bedtime Battles!
What’s the wildest bedtime excuse your tween has ever given?
Drop it in the comments—let’s laugh (and maybe cry) together!
The Best (and Strangest) Excuses from Other Parents
Parents shared their most unforgettable bedtime excuses—can you top these?
Your Turn!
Comment with the funniest bedtime excuse you’ve heard!
