I’m thrilled to have an essay in the book My Other Ex: Women’s True Stories of Losing and Leaving Friends, which will be released on September 15, 2014.
It’s from The HerStories Project, which explores many different topics surrounding female friendships. Goodness knows, there’s a lot to take about when it comes to friendship. Here are a few of my favorite lines from recent blog posts about the intersection of parenting and friendship by My Other Ex contributors.
* A mom’s advice to her 12 year-old on making friends at her new school:
“[A]s you go about your first weeks in a new school embrace those who reach out to you even if they may not be familiar with your interests and more importantly be that person for others. Do not feel like you have to give up a part of you to be accepted or make friends. You are enough. Your differences may just be what helps someone else grow. More importantly, as you navigate your way through the ups and downs of friendship that will undoubtedly come at your age, know that you have a friend in me.”
* On the ups and downs of mom friendships:
“If your friendship is causing you pain rather than giving you a strong source of support, it’s okay to move on. Being a mom is hard enough, and the last thing you need is more drama and tantrums in your life — especially from people who are supposed to give you a break from it.”
– from “Managing Mom Friends: When it’s the grown-ups who need help getting along” on Seleni by Suzanne Barston, who also blogs at Fearless Formula Feeder
* On how becoming a mother changes everything, including our friendships:
“[I]t wasn’t just losing their friendship that was devastating to me. It was losing what our friendship represented. I had lost myself. I often don’t feel like Jen, the friend and person anymore. I am Jen, the Mommy. My pre-baby life is gone. Everything about me and my lie has been redefined. Wine glasses? Try sippy cups.”
* On how parents influence their children’s friendships:
“I wonder if I had larger friend groups and handled crowds better if she would cast a wider net herself.”
– from “Nature Vs. Nurture: Friendship Styles and Our Kids” on the HerStories Project blog by yours truly
Friendship and parenthood are so clearly intertwined, and I’m very grateful to editors Jessica Smock and Stephanie Sprenger for starting and fostering these important discussions on such important topics.
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